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  • Why You Should Start Individual Therapy Before Going Into Couples

    You are probably at this point, fighting, yelling, and arguing about everything. You can’t agree on anything and are tired of having the same fights over and over again. You may be asking yourself, “Is my marriage in trouble?”

    There is an absolutely great benefit whether you choose individual or couples’ therapy, but starting with yourself first, helps you to gain more insight about you inside of the relationship, and then you can bring that up into the couple’s session.

    Let’s dive in!

    Many people are familiar with the idea of individual therapy, which takes place in the one-to-one interactions between a therapist and a single client, whether that is face-to-face or virtual. When you attend individual therapy, the therapist gives you their full attention, their energy, and their focus. It is the therapist’s job to focus solely on you and to build a safe and nurturing relationship that fosters personal transformation and healing.

    In individual therapy, as the therapist gets to know you and understand situations and experiences from your unique perspective, they will offer insights, tips, tools, and techniques specifically tailored to your individual needs, personality, and perspectives. See it as taking some time for yourself to really reflect on your years together with your partner, those moments together, the memories, the things you both have accomplished, your goals, your plans, your behaviors, feelings, things that both of you have been talking about, likes, dislikes, etc.

    Is like going on vacation/discovery with yourself for the first time alone and getting to know other aspects of yourself that you were not aware of before and probably without wanting it and unconsciously you have been imposing in the relationship, like unaware limiting beliefs, fears, worries and all of these has been affecting throughout the years.

    Maybe some of the feelings you are experiencing with your partner come from other issues that have been repressed/suppressed and have been placing them into your partner because she or he is your safe place, without even noticing it.

    A person may know for sure that they have personal issues. Thus, it can be beneficial for them to go to therapy on their own for a few sessions before they start going to couples counseling. They might even suggest that their partner sees a therapist on their own as well.

    Certain issues, including mental health challenges, might be better treated in individual therapy. For example, if someone is struggling with imposter syndrome, they may be better helped in individual therapy. Issues like anxiety, depression, substance abuse, or anger management issues also are regularly covered in individual counseling.

    When you contact a therapist you may be wanting to discover if your marriage is in trouble, so you want to find someone who can address and validate your concerns and resolve the issues, while you work on yourself.

    At Aventurine Counseling and Coaching we help individuals just like you to discover those patterns that might be affecting you in the relationship and those patterns about the relationship. While you heal and process you will become more aware and conscious of triggers, and past experiences that are still present and you will focus more on what you really want from the relationship.